FAQs

So….What is this Hawkeye Bean all about?

When it comes to the Hawkeyes there are two facts which can not be debated.  First, studies have shown every Hawkeye fan is insightful, hilarious, intelligent and possess the odd ability to out kick the coverage when it comes to wives or girlfriends.    That last part is just for the males, but you get the picture.  So, how do we use these gifts for the betterment of man?  Easy, we start blogs and yap endlessly about all things Hawkeye.

Second, everything looks better with a Hawkeye logo on it .  Again, it is science.  Take for example the ground breaking “Bielema Project” being conducted at the University of Wisconsin.  Researchers are trying to reverse the damaging effects of being a Badger with a Hawkeye tattoo.  The subject looks better than the control subjects, but unfortunately is becoming more Badger-y everyday.

So there you go.  Hawkeye Bean is here for talking Hawkeye sports and keeping the world beautiful, one Hawkeye shirt at a time.

 

Will everything always be spelled properly and grammatically correct? 

With all the proofreading and editing technology at ones disposal, you would have to be a complete idiot for it not to be.  Well, I have proven to be such an idiot and can circummvent them all (see).

 

Hawkeye Bean, this is the greatest site ever.  How can I help? 

Thank you, mom, random weirdo, or person I’m blackmailing with knowledge of inappropriate twitpics.  If you truly enjoy our effort, the best thing is to just comment on stuff.   After that, the usual Facebook “like” and so on.

 

When I click on an item, I’m sent to another vendor’s site.  Why can’t I just buy from you and you ship it?  

Honestly, I would just screw that up.  Think of yourself as a cow in a pasture with other like minded cows.  Your buying decision is like the process of grinding your meat and bones into products to be consumed by others.  Smart people have figured out the best way to get you out of the pasture is to get a sexy, funny cow to lead you.  That’s me, I’m the sexy, funny cow!!  I lead you to the grind….I mean Hawkeye Tee Shirt, but after that I let the experts take over.

So now that you are probably grossed out and a re-devoted vegan, I hope you have a better understanding of our site and the internet in general.  Also, you have earned 16 credit hours towards an MBA in Sales just by reading the paragraph above…so, moooo…

 

When I click to “buy” an item I don’t land on the item, the vendor is out of stock or I get an error message.

Anytime technology fails me, I think the best method of dealing with it is to freak out like my favorite hockey team just blew the Stanley Cup.  If you are a better person than me or have already overturned a car in anger and it didn’t help, please send us an email to bryon@hawkeyebean.com.

 

Okay, so what’s in it for me?

Every website has one ultimate responsibility, to provide a place to waste time at work.  Hopefully we achieve that here at Hawkeye Bean, fingers crossed.  Secondly, I get discounts from some vendors in the form of coupon codes.  Some will be on the site, others circulated via our Facebook page, fax, shouted out the window or other means.  Lastly, we are trying to build a well organized store that protects our visitors from things like IOWA STATE HAWKEYE or UNIVERSITY of IOWA CYCLONES.

 

I don’t really follow the Hawkeyes, but my fiance is a huge fan.  I have always dreamed of a beautiful fall wedding  and booked it for mid October.  Now my fiance is very upset with me.  Apparently there is a game or something that day.  I would like to make it up to him by doing a Wedding Gift Registration on Hawkeyebean.com.  How do I register our big day?

I’m so upset right now it is hard to type.  You never, ever schedule a wedding on a Hawkeye game day.  Hawkeye fans don’t even attend funerals if there isn’t at least a 42 TV available to mourners during pregame to  the last whistle.    But this isn’t about you, who I can only assume is incredibly good looking to get away with such a misdeed.  This is about a Hawkeye brother who is hurting, so here you go….

All you need to do is send an email to bryon@hawkeyebean.com.  Include the parties last names, the date and the url of up to 15 products you would like your guests to purchase for your wedding (see below).  You can also include a short message to appear on your page and a picture if you wish.  Please note that whatever you include can be viewed by anyone coming to Hawkeye Bean.  Once your wedding is registered, it will appear under the Wedding Gift Registry.  We’ll also send you an email with a link to your page to send to whoever you like.

To get the url, press the “Details” button of the product you are interested  (seen below).